меч) - Страница 2

Terminus · 24.02.2005, 22:09

This is the situation: there's a beautiful princess trapped in a castle
watched by a dragon. Here's the end of the story with different styles
of metalheads as knights.

POWER METAL:

The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the
dragon,
saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.

TRASH METAL:

The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princes and fucks
her.

HEAVY METAL:

The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few
beers and fucks the princess.

FOLK METAL:

The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins,
flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls sleep (because
of all the dancing). Then all leave....without the princess.

VIKING METAL:

The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty
axe,
skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her
belongings and burns the castle before leaving.

DEATH METAL:

The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills
her, then leaves.

BLACK METAL:

The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in
front of the castle. Then he sodomises the princess, drinks her blood
in
a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the
dragon.

GORE METAL:

The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front
of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her. Then he fucks the dead
body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the
carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last
time.

DOOM METAL:

The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he
could
never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon
eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad
story.

PROGRESIVE METAL:

The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes.
The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the
princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes
he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes
looking for the "HEAVY METAL" protagonist.

GLAM METAL:

The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and
lets him enter. He steals the princess' make-up and tries to paint the
castle in a beautiful pink color.

NU METAL:

The protagonist arrives in a run-down Honda Civic and attempts to fight
the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch
fire.
Моё -
Speed metal
протеганистприходитубиваетдраконаспасаетпринцессуиуходит
Mayhem:
протеганист приходит, и все уже мертвы.
Opeth:
протеганист приходит, весь злой и нападает на дракона. и вдруг, протеганист начинает реветь всместе с драконом. потом им опять овладевает гнев, и он убивает дракона. он поднимается к принцессе, заходит в дверь.. и опять в слезы. принцесса пытается его успокоить, но гнев опять им овладевает, и он её убивает. поняв, что он сделал, он начинает плакать и плывет обратно в швецию.
Sludge metal:
протеганист... входит ....в замок....очень.....медленно........... поднимает....взор...на....дракона......вытаскивает......пистолет...и....целится...в темноту

.Rck_Cnd. · 24.02.2005, 22:15

Reggie – Меч, это хорошо, но ты попробуй мою травку, чувак....
еее ман%)
забавно

))...тока я непонимаю почему именно меч тут везде употребляется?...
П.С...регги пишется так---Reggae

КСЮША · 24.02.2005, 22:20

про рэгги и про хаус вооще угар! сам придумал?

Only You Baby... · 24.02.2005, 22:27

О гопсатр объявился!

Shirk · 24.02.2005, 22:38

Мы рыцари джедаи, мы борцы со злом, темную силу завяжем узлом

Порно-автомат · 24.02.2005, 23:19

oi! - nepravda! Boots are made fro fightin!
Hardcore - nado perepisat' v heavy metal!
A heavy metal - ya voz'mu svoi SWORD i pereplavlu ego na zaklepki

Oi! Putins добавил:
A oi - ya dumayu sword eto nemnogo dorogovato, luchshe kupit' martins i na4istit' imi tvoyu zadnicu